wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
