His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
