Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize