Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Randomize
