I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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