Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize