Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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