Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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