She's JV to your varsity
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
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