I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Randomize
