you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize