Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
