have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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