found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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