It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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