yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
