you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
