i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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