we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
