going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I forgot wine drunk hurts
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
