Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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