i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
