The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
