I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
someone threw a dead crab at me
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
