its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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