well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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