omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
