At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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