love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
