forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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