he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
