He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
