That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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