I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
