Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
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