i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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