I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize