Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
