Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize