maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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