Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
