how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
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