I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
