I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
