The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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