it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
