Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
