Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
