its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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