Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize